DancingMermaid » pick something you can believe

pick something you can believe

brave

recently a very wise and kind friend passed on some insightful information regarding affirmations….and i wanted to share her sage advice with you peeps.

by now we know all about “the secret” and how our thoughts become things….but what about when you are already struggling and can’t believe the affirmation you are trying to enforce? this actually can make you feel WORSE. i always had thought i sucked at this positive thinking thing, but really this only happened when i picked things i did not actually believe.

for example, a gremlin i have is: I’M NOT ENOUGH. the practical turn-around would be, I AM ENOUGH, right? but in the throws of chaos and self doubt, this is not something that makes me feel better because i am not there yet. however, i do believe that i always do my best. so, that is my new affirmation that comforts me when those i-am-not-doing-enough feelings surface. consequently i also believe that doing your best IS enough…see how this works? its just a little spin that your brain can work with.

when i was single and wanted to find a partner, i was told by well-meaning friends and self books to visualize it! to pretend that he was already here. again, at the time, i could not see that. i beat myself up for not “believing enough” and therefor that was the reason i was single and alone. (remember charlotte from sex and the city at the affirmation seminar? “you are JUST NOT believing enough!”) looking back, i DID believe that someone was out there….i only wish i could go back and tell that broken hearted girl that it was all going to work out.

other bits i have rearranged…

i am quirky.
(verses i am beautiful)

i work hard to be compassionate towards people i don’t understand.
(verses i love everybody)

i feel grounded in my dreams.
(verses i don’t care what anyone thinks)

this may not be the popular opinion, but this is something that has worked really well for me and i am a girl that likes to share the wealth. it is not a way to put yourself down, it is a way to work with what you’ve got.

and so, if this speaks to you in any way, i gently ask you:

what are you not believing about yourself,
and can you rephrase it in a way you DO believe?

magictree1

23 Comments so far
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THANK YOU -THANK YOU-THANK YOU.

b r a v e
indeed

bravely yours,
ncp

Very well said. In the book I am currently reading Life is a Verb by Patti Digh one of the lessons is to take a picture of a flower from very angle. Then look at the pictures and realize that it all depends on where you are standing on what perspective you get. Everyone is seeing the same flower but their description of the flower is from where they are standing around the flower. Your changing affirmations to meet where you are standing at in life is JUST AWESOME! Thanks so much for sharing.

Awesome post! I think that’s a great idea. I keep telling myself that I’m doing great at juggling 3 kids (I just had my third in March). But I do not truly feel that I’m doing great. I do, however, feel that I’m doing good enough and that’s what I need to be affirming. Thanks for the perspective!

so many things … got the YOU ARE ENOUGH rock near to me… just gifted the love rock to someone I felt might need it a little more than me right now…

working on brave … since I am always struggling with what brave and strong mean — am I hiding from being vulnerable… I am brave and I need people, it’s ok… that’s the one, I think.

thanks! you are certainly enough (and more) for me — your love is always greatly appreciated!

Amen, sister!! Thank you!!! I struggle with I am not enough too…. xoxo, ~ M.

This was so inspiring. It’s got me thinking…

I know this is a total long shot…here goes anyway!! Not sure how far Encinitas is to Temecula, but I would LOVE for you to join me this evening. My friends’ band (D’Santi) is playing in old town Temecula on Front Street at the Longshadow Winery — wanna come out for wine tasting, good vibes, & to listen to some really great music? xoxo, ~ M.

I love this! Very wise words…

Love you too!

hmm, that’s a really wise and lovely way to look at things. thank you for sharing your perspective. it makes a lot of sense to me. time for some rearranging i think..

mmmmm….something so obvious and easy…but you don’t think about until you read it…beautiful McCabe..thank you xx

i like this. a lot. thank you. xo

Holy cow! And all this time I thought it was just me. Affirmations have always felt so silly and after reading this I think you’ve just solved the problem. It is silly to lie to yourself and expect to believe it. I need to find some new affirmations. Thank you.

p.s. I’m really looking forward to working this into the affirmations class for Mermaid Warriors.

mccabe… you always know what to say, and how to share your view with us, who are always waiting to hear your bits of wisdom… a true mermaid!!!

thank you for sharing this with us, you’ve got me thinking and realising so many more things that i believe about myself than what i don’t believe.

Thank you for this post! I just posted about this, this past Tues, and have been conversing with a best friend about it too – being a positive thinker when voices in my head make me believe the worst fears I have about myself.

Thanks for helping me stay brave, at least, as brave as I can stand in a given moment.

I love it! I needed to hear this … b/c I am working on some affirmation cards for MW class…

And, I think it’s funny you mentioned Charlotte… that’s EXACTLY what I thought of before I read your side-note. And I love that Carrie says, “NO… she’s OUT THERE!”

Ciao!

I’ve really been thinking about this one. The way I see it, you can tell yourself “I am perfect” a million times but it means nothing if you can’t convince yourself to believe it. So baby steps right? So I’m not perfect…but I am a good person who deserves love and respect. It is an easier pill to swallow Have I told you lately that you are awesome?

Wonderful! Thank you so for this.

told ya you are a “wise woman”….this post rocks!

i loove this!
i do it in my workshops to help move through resistance. we do a whole series of affirmations starting with a statement of how we are actually feeling in that moment, and then take little baby believable steps into something that feels better.

we can be happy, but we have to be real!

Thank you.
And you ARE beautiful!

Very wise words. Like you, I believe that if we reframe something rather than trying to force something to apply to ourselves, then the fit will be much better.

Trying to live by someone else’s affirmations just doesn’t seem authentic to me. We have to create our own affirmations in order to really believe them.

Here’s one I would like to reframe:

I am enough.

-I am all that I need to be at this time in my life.

Thank you for providing such a thought-provoking post.

Hugs,
Debbie

Oh, my! That is the answer for me! I feel the same, struggling to believe my affirmations and then feeling worse when I don’t. But I can do this, and I know it will lead me to that path of fully realizing the true me. Thank you again!

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