DancingMermaid » what i did over summer vacation…

what i did over summer vacation…

7 art camps, 54 art journals, 5 containers of mod podge, 15 tubes of glitter glue, one cat with indigo paint on her paws, one very patient boyfriend, 9 trips to rhino art and i AM DONE.

*
i really have not had the time or energy to do much else this summer. this was almost like giving birth to a deeper self…all focus was put into figuring out this new eclectic life i have created. there were many days where i thought there is no way i am going to make it, i am in over my head….but i did it imperfectly anyway. and i feel kinda proud.

if nothing else, i have learned this summer the importance of doing what you love. even on bad days-even when i was trying to explain the law of attraction and the class was more interested in gathering around a new pile of poop that the dog had left, i knew i was trying. i knew i had stopped hiding behind jobs that did not serve me. i knew that it was all part of the process.

you see, i am learning how to play by my own rules-and that i work most authentically when i make it up as i go along.

i never really knew what i wanted to be when i grew up. i always loved kids so teaching and childcare related jobs seemed practical for me-and yet, there was always something missing. even in the most liberal of schools-i was the teacher who stuck out. who did not fit. i never fit in at high school either. by college i learned how to blend but the feeling of being different-and-not-in-a-good-way never faded. (no matter how much beer i consumed, and it was a lot) because of this i was filled with self doubt and suffered from low self esteem. i always wanted to show some improved version of myself instead of my real self. i never knew there was another way.

now i know there is another way. there is something i can do-art with kids. with girls. it feels odd to admit that. i never really thought i was good at anything before. i never had a niche.

perhaps my niche is simply allowing others to be themselves and providing a space for it, with art supplies as an added bonus. this seems easy and natural to me. come to think of it, i have been doing this off the clock for years. the only difference now is that i get paid for it.

these amazing little girls have given me so many gifts….unconditional love, for one. i take them seriously and they take me seriously. that is another gift. i had a girl from one of my older classes-emma, help out with the little girls this week. i overheard a child complain, “everyone is COPYING me!!!” and then i heard emma’s sweet voice say, “we don’t like to say copied, we like to say inspired….”

i don’t really have an official tribe but if i did these chickies would be it. they are magic. my magic.

i have wanted to do something like this for 7 years. yep, it took me that long to get some balls and just go for it. i tell you this so you may see the full picture here. it seems as if it all fell in my lap-and in a strange way it did…but only after i took that leap of faith. all that talk of opening up new channels when you rid of the crap and clutter in your life, turns out its true. who knew?

i know there are others out there. those deep feelers who always felt they were a little too different from their peers, who maybe felt an isolation or a thread of loneliness because of it. the ones who did not find their “career” choice in college, (nothing looked interesting to me either) the ones who felt the joke was a bit harsh and cynical. this feeling-i really do believe this with all my heart-is a GIFT. the gift that all too often gets beaten out of us by the media and the pressure to be a “grown-up” and realistic.

don’t let them pressure you, the ones who forgot about the magic. the world needs the light bearers now more than ever.

there is not only a place for EVERYONE in the creative world, but a special room for you, too. please take your own ideas seriously. please trust me when i tell you how important your vision is, not only to the world at large but to yourself.

i am not saying you have to quit your day job or turn your life upside down. (hey i can be dramatic) i am just encouraging you to listen to yourself…

and to listen to your dreams…you know the dream i am talking about-the one that keeps nagging, the one that sneaks up on you unexpectedly until you have to say, “you again? i thought i had outgrown you.” what if you followed that voice’s directions? how would your quality of life improve?

the children, they know. they know even if it is not taught on a daily basis. they know because the vibration of truth is clear to them-they are still innocent. i trust their voice.

it has been so lovely to share this special summer with you, dear readers. i feel like you are a big part of this experience. thank you for cheering me on!

i would like to gift you back with this space, with my story, in hopes that it will inspire you to pursue your own dreams and ideas. not only do i believe more strongly in my own dreams now, but i believe in yours, too.

dream big, folks. and then come over here to tell me about it.

24 Comments so far
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it’s late and i read this and i want to start doing cartwheels for you because you are making your dreams come true and we’ve all witnessed it this summer, it’s beautiful and you are beautiful sweet friend. now, can i come over and play?

xxoxo

yep. just…yep.

I’m the one that never fit in. I am the one that is slowly over the years manifesting her creative dream. I am the one tried so hard to be what I thought others wanted me to be, tried to fit in, tried to not be weird.

but I am and it finally got too hard and too damaging to not be myself.

I am still figuring out who and what that is. I am doing things my own way.

and you have been a huge inspiration for that-I just want you to know. Knowing that someone else out there feels that way and went through those experiences and still creates and still tries and still listens to that still small voice helped me have the bravery to do it too.

you compeltely rock.

This was really beautiful and emotional to read. Thank you for sharing what you’re doing and inspiring all of us.

Things are starting to open up for me, but I’m not sure what’s ahead…

You are a true inspiration. I too was lost, but am on a path to finding myself. I left a nasty “corporate “job in search of happiness. I am looking to share yoga with children and plus size ladies- both I think are most deserving. And both are super fun to be around. It’s been a difficult path, to leave the paycheck and take the steps to a whole new world. I’m getting closer every day. Thank you for showing me the endless possibilitis.

An inspiring post! I am glad you are able to do what you love. Thank you for sharing your journey!

hi there - I AM dreaming big and I will come over and tell you about it as soon as I’m ready - thank you for giving a voice to that feeling way deep down inside - you are magic!

I have so been that one who never quite fits- still. The harsh joke that hurt, or being the one to gain courage from a bottle- ah, college. I’m making space for the creative side of me and delving in to the idea of artist/ academic. I recently took a small plunge and created an Art Journal box which I’m circulating through my friends and their daughters if they are so inclined. I heard my one friend’s daughter broke right in to the box when I passed it to her. thank you for your inspiration- oh, and this is where I learned about circles of art journaling. http://embers.typepad.com/

Sweet beautiful Mermie- thank you so much for sharing in this inspiring post, you never cease to inspire and make me smile:)
It was so good to see you and hug you in person, thanks for making time for a spontaneous visit, keep up all of your dreaming…

awesome kids and awesome you.

wow. what a dream, and how beautiful and magical was it was to see it unfold into your reality over these summer days… thank you for sharing it and being such an inspiration.
personally i am still finding the courage to dream big, but i am getting there slowly but surely… autumn could see the magic for me…
in the meantime, the safe space you offer holds the fragile beginnings of so many amazing possibilities: thank you xx

:) i am so happy for you, so filled with joy that your dreams became a summer filled with such inspiration, such beauty!!

i so know … after shooting three weddings this summer, i am so filled with awe and joy that i got to be a part of such special days and that not only was it incredibly joyously fun but i am really good at it *blush … the photos make my heart skip a beat, the feedback and thanks we got just on how we handled the days was so amazing and still fills me with such joy. more jobs are cropping up almost daily, the universe is opening up her arms and it just thrills me. today even … at farmer’s market, i came across a beautiful woman who makes the most adorable hats which i will be photographing for her ’cause i will so work for hats, tee hee …

life is full of possibilities and this summer really showed me the truth in that and showed me that i am so much more capable than i ever imagined, capable of creating magic outside of normal life

muh love honey, xo

you are such a breath of fresh air, such an inspiration to many.
this was an emotional read for me…yep, tears in my eyes…as I am also searching for what I want to be or maybe discovering who I already am…right now both of them scare me.

You are so sweet and wonderful…and here…OH YES GIRL…here is where you fit in perfectly !!!…and for that we have all been blessed !!!

{oops…and I wanted to ask you to come by and see our newly adopted furry, four legged baby…not a kitty…but a dwarf bunny of all things and we love her as if she were a cat}
www.moredoors.blogspot.com

you are such an inspiration to me, in so many ways… i was nodding and smiling through this whole post. i love you and your braveness and your acceptance of self to create this amazing life you are living.

you are magic.

xoxo

“perhaps my niche is simply allowing others to be themselves and providing a space for it”

No small feat! Thanks for making this space and for sharing it with us… truly special and INSPIRING!

This post made me well up with tears!
Inspiring and lovely, just like you…
Thank you

My dear what you have done over this summer has been a dream of mine also. I never could put it together as well as you, in fact it is still a jumble in my mind. I always wanted to have a camp where children could come together, be authentic, be accepted, explore there creativity, learn about the enviorment and what surrounds them, and develop a stronger sense of self esteem while helping others and spreading love and joy. I feel you actually put into action what I have wanted to do in my heart. I admire your courage for just going for it and putting yourself out there. I am curious how you developed your wings and started to fly. You are a true inspiration to me! Thank you so much for feeling so comfortable to share this with us.

Thank you…just, thank you.
I have graduated with a master’s degree in a career that doesn’t fully define me. Your post made me realize that there is no shame in leaving it behind me and finding out who I really am.

I’m so glad I found you and this space. I feel like I have the support of all these invisible souls who feel that same lovely strangness that I feel. I have been denying what my heart has been telling me for the longest time, because it wasn’t sensible or logical or practical in the eyes of others. Well you know what, who the hell cares what they think? F-them! I AM brave and I AM enough and I AM amazing. And because of you and everyone here…I’m not alone.

PS take a vacation for goodness sakes lady, you deserve it

Man, you have a way of getting inside my heart and inching around all up in there and telling me over and over again to just listen to my heart already. I’m definitely on my way there, still taking steps each day to move toward the life I believe I am meant to live . . . but there are still voices in there that say the Big Dreams, the Ones That Keep Me Up At Night . . . those dreams are too big for me and I don’t deserve them and nobody would even care and they would probably laugh their heads off anyway.

But here you are, admitting your dream and just going for it, learning from the mistakes along the way. Why don’t we give ourselves more permission to do that? Why do we feel such a pressure to do things perfectly or not do them at all?

I’m still learning to take courage. I’m not fully there yet, but I’m paying attention.

those girly girls are so adorable…

hi sweet lady
alma and i checked out your video and she saw herself and said “ooooooh!!! alma pay-ping!!! (thats how she says painting)and got a huge grin on her face.
cant wait to see you soon.
:)
shakti

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what i did over summer vacation…

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